MISTAKES AND INDIANISMS

Some awful Indianisms have made their way into the newspaper. It’s so disorienting to see it in print…. Quite, like an itch in the middle of your back. I remember meeting a farmer in Thanjavur recently, who said that he spent his evenings at the local library reading ‘The Hindu’ to learn English. If he’s read the following, we know which way his English is headed.

After India’s shock defeat by Bangladesh ‘The Hindu’ carried a front-page photograph of some delinquents destroying Dhoni’s house. The caption read, ‘People breaking M.S.Dhoni’s under-construction house.’

Then there was another story on the inside pages about education and ended with ‘students going to abroad.’

The New Indian Express splashed the story on Bob Woolmer’s death on the front page. But it was littered with mistakes. It said, Bob Woolmer was planning to ‘part company with’ the Pakistanis. Then the paper informed us that it was a ‘high pressurized job.’ It ended by saying that the stresses of coaching the Pakistani side might have taken their ‘tol’.

On the second page of that days paper was a puzzling headline which read, ‘Middlemen play on the poor.’ What ...like step on them and use them as a playground? What?

And if anybody from a newspaper office is reading this, could you please stop saying, ‘Very much thankful’. It’s wrong.

Have you seen the totally bland quotes that make headlines in ‘The Hindu’? For instance, ‘Parents advised to guide students during exams.’ I always look forward to reading the headline on the Governor’s insipid speeches. For example, ‘Governor advises youth to work hard.’ Such illuminating stuff!

I’ll end with this hilarious headline from ‘The Hindu’ once again, the morning after the Ganesh Chaturthi festival. ‘Idols immersed, Three feared drowned.’